Discworld Quotes

[Optimus Prime Rib]

GAME TIME!

List 1 Discworld quote per turn and see if anyone can name the book its from. Then they get to list another quote and so on and so forth.

Bonus points if you can name the character that says it.

(points may be redeemed from Aaron Hong's ridonculous TF collection)


Ill start with one of my favorites:

Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder.
Elves are marvelous. They cause marvels.
Elves are fantastic. They create fantasies.
Elves are glamorous. They project glamour.
Elves are enchanting. They weave enchantment.
Elves are terrific. They beget terror.
The thing about words is that meanings can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes look for them behind words that have changed their meaning.
No one ever said elves are nice.
Elves are bad.

[Metal Vendetta]

Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder.
Elves are marvelous. They cause marvels.
Elves are fantastic. They create fantasies.
Elves are glamorous. They project glamour.
Elves are enchanting. They weave enchantment.
Elves are terrific. They beget terror.
The thing about words is that meanings can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes look for them behind words that have changed their meaning.
No one ever said elves are nice.
Elves are bad.

Easy, Lords and Ladies. The narrator says it, so I guess Terry himself? Next up:
"Just erotic. Nothing kinky. It's the difference between using a feather and using a chicken."

[Optimus Prime Rib]

Easy, Lords and Ladies. The narrator says it, so I guess Terry himself? Next up:
"Just erotic. Nothing kinky. It's the difference between using a feather and using a chicken."

I want to say "Faust" aka Eric and I know I am going to be wrong when i say Rincewind.

I havent read Eric in almost 20 years lol.

I know its one of the original books so if I am off, dont shoot me.

Also sounds like something Nanny Ogg would say. So maybe Witches Abroad or Equal Rites.

I know I lose this round, but here goes one that is really easy, and Ill go ahead and say its another narrator moment:
"Cuius testiculos habes, habeas cardia et cerebellum"

Poor eagle..

[Metal Vendetta]

I want to say "Faust" aka Eric and I know I am going to be wrong when i say Rincewind.

I havent read Eric in almost 20 years lol.

Right first time - though again, I think it's narrator, rather than Rincewind

Here goes one that is really easy, and Ill go ahead and say its another narrator moment:
"Cuius testiculos habes, habeas cardia et cerebellum"

Poor eagle..

That's gotta be from Small Gods though I can't place who says it...Dios maybe?
[edit] Hah, didn't read the question properly. Narrator then

What about this one?
"You can't ask questions, it's magic. It doesn't explain anything, it's magic. You don't know where it comes from, it's magic! That's what I don't like about magic, it does everything by magic!"

[Optimus Prime Rib]

I want to say "Faust" aka Eric and I know I am going to be wrong when i say Rincewind.

I havent read Eric in almost 20 years lol.

Right first time - though again, I think it's narrator, rather than Rincewind

Here goes one that is really easy, and Ill go ahead and say its another narrator moment:
"Cuius testiculos habes, habeas cardia et cerebellum"

Poor eagle..

That's gotta be from Small Gods though I can't place who says it...Dios maybe?
[edit] Hah, didn't read the question properly. Narrator then

What about this one?
"You can't ask questions, it's magic. It doesn't explain anything, it's magic. You don't know where it comes from, it's magic! That's what I don't like about magic, it does everything by magic!"

Ok it took some digging. I havent read Thud! yet So after 2 days of digging through my collection, I had to cheat and have google come to the rescue.

and it was Vimes to Carrot.


Now that I think about it. there are SO many good quotes that are just narration, its hard to only use the ones that are spoken amongst the characters. Oh yeah and it was Small Gods. But Dios was in Pyramids. You were thinking of Vorbis I think.

"Just because someone's a member of an ethnic minority doesn't mean they're not a nasty small-minded little jerk ..."