Very badly in need of help.

Pissin' Poonani · Post by **Pissin' Poonani** » Tue May 31, 2005 7:19 am

As if life hasn't been sucking enough recently, I've been sat here for half an hour watching Big Brother and I fear it's already starting to hook me. I can see me just 'having the odd look' to see what's going on, and before long I'll be glued to the telly at 4am watching them all sleep, my tired brain desperately hoping that the attractive ladies will forget they're on camera and start getting all frisky.

Kill me. Kill me now.

Obfleur · Post by **Obfleur** » Tue May 31, 2005 7:26 am

That's it. You're banned.

But please do tell if they start to get frisky

"Science believes he is a massively talented musician destined for success. He described himself as "a bit like James Dean but without the motorcycle and tight jeans." Science has a phobia of anything that buzzes as he was once stung in the mouth."

Oh hell yes. He's my favourite already.

Sam looks hot.

Post by **Kaylee** » Tue May 31, 2005 7:45 am

I still love the Rainbow annual-

How to make a big brother simulator using a shoebox.

1. Take the lid of the shoebox
2. Put it on its side
3. Stare at it for up to 8 hours a day.
4. If anything interesting happens, you're on the wrong channel.

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Tue May 31, 2005 8:11 am

There ain't nothing wrong with watching a bit of Big Bro.

My early impressions:

Sam's incredibly gorgeous but must be extremely vacuous to fancy Anthony.

Kemal and Science are good value.

Craig is probably not a nice man.

Makosi is definitely thick-skinned.

Roberto seems an alright bloke.

Anthony's a ****.

Maxwell: could go either way.

Everyone's quite good looking.

Except Lesley. Someone needs to tell her this.

Obfleur · Post by **Obfleur** » Tue May 31, 2005 8:13 am

"Adventurous Lesley describes herself as "sexy, bitchy and loud" with her "big brown Bambi eyes" and her "very busty and curvaceous" figure as her key assets. Asked why other housemates would nominate her, she claimed it would be "for being a bitch, for stirring things up."

Quote: "I flirt with guys all the time, even the minging ones, just for a laugh."

Post by **Best First** » Tue May 31, 2005 10:47 am

i refuse to be drawn in until at least week 4.

cos i'm deep and spiritual see?

Metal Vendetta · Post by **Metal Vendetta** » Tue May 31, 2005 11:07 am

Obfleur wrote:"Adventurous Lesley describes herself as "sexy, bitchy and loud" with her "big brown Bambi e2yes" and her "very busty and curvaceous" figure as her key assets."

"curvaceous" = "hugely fat"?

I haven't seen any of this series yet, but I caught that thing with Dermot O'Leary the other night with the 20 best housemates. As soon as Marco came on and started squealing like a demented pig with half its head caved in, I remembered why I don't watch BB.

Post by **Best First** » Tue May 31, 2005 11:19 am

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Tue May 31, 2005 11:21 am

Marco wasn't in the Top 20 was he?

Metal Vendetta · Post by **Metal Vendetta** » Tue May 31, 2005 11:24 am

'Fraid so. High teens though.

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Tue May 31, 2005 11:31 am

Jesus...

I mean... [composite word including 'f*ck'].

Obfleur · Post by **Obfleur** » Tue May 31, 2005 11:35 am

Is this the Marco you are speaking of?

He looks exactly like a gay finnish dude, that can be seen frequently on swedish telly.

His name is Mark Levengood.

Brendocon · Post by **Brendocon** » Tue May 31, 2005 11:35 am

Marco was top value. The first Lord of the Rings tie-in contestant.

He was a ****.

All the wimmin are brunettes this year, ain't they? Bit odd, innit? I wonder if that was intentional.

I was talking to somebody on Saturday who intends to not watch any of it until the last episode. His girlfriend then pointed out that it's pointless to only watch the last one, as he won't know who they are. In doing so she gave him the excuse to not watch the last one either.

Science is quality value from what I've seen.
Anthony's the hairdresser, right? He's a ****.
I think there might be about twenty brain cells between the lot of them...

KingMob · Post by **KingMob** » Tue May 31, 2005 4:06 pm

Science currently favourite for first eviction, apparently.

This is a nice pic.

This isn't:

Neither's this, come to that:

What on Earth were some of them thinking when getting their official pics done this year?

Only saw one of the hour-long shows at the weekend, nobody really stood out, apart from Makosi obv.

Impactor returns 2.0 · Post by **Impactor returns 2.0** » Tue May 31, 2005 4:07 pm

I think they are all twarty ***** who need to be shot so far.

that bitch might be pretty but shes still a cock. I would yes, but from behind and with a bag.

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Tue May 31, 2005 4:12 pm

Impactor returns 2.0 · Post by **Impactor returns 2.0** » Tue May 31, 2005 4:26 pm

this one

- shes a real smug git

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Tue May 31, 2005 10:35 pm

Smug, yes. But a bag?

Impactor returns 2.0 · Post by **Impactor returns 2.0** » Tue May 31, 2005 10:59 pm

hehe - dont ask

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue May 31, 2005 11:10 pm

Scary Movie 2?

All I know about this year's BB is what I caught off Moyles in the agonising few minutes that work had the radio on.

Some cockney guy was giving it all "big potatoes" or something, Lesley being Lesley obviously, and the posh guy saying everyone's name 3 times?

And that's about all the time I have for BB this year.

Post by **Best First** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 8:41 pm

A missile directly at this place would infinitely improve the world.

dear god.

IronHide · Post by **IronHide** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 5:34 am

Where? Here? Transfans?

Nah.....improvement=Ban-a-nations!!!!

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 8:39 am

... a bag?

Post by **Best First** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 8:43 am

Does anyone else suddenly wish they were there just so you could tell them all they are cocks?

Obfleur · Post by **Obfleur** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 8:49 am

I wish I was in BB, just so I could scream "Hey everybody, gather around in the garden!" then I would go inside and lock the door and laugh at them for days and days.

I wonder what would happen... if I would get kicked out or something.

Pissin' Poonani · Post by **Pissin' Poonani** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 10:22 am

Obfleur wrote:I wish I was in BB, just so I could scream "Hey everybody, gather around in the garden!" then I would go inside and lock the door and laugh at them for days and days.

I wonder what would happen... if I would get kicked out or something.

That would be awesome.

Myself, I'd go all 'Colonel Kurtz' on them. Smash all the lights in the attic room, and just sit there wrapped in a blanket, mumbling.

Failing that, use mud to camo my face, and sit in the kitchen sink holding a knife. Just stare at everyone for hours on end.

Metal Vendetta · Post by **Metal Vendetta** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 11:59 am

I'd walk around swearing and masturbating. That way they wouldn't be able to broadcast my image or voice most of the time and the general public would have no idea who I was...

Obfleur · Post by **Obfleur** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 12:03 pm

...I'd totally buy the "Unrated BB DVD set - the stuff we couldn't show you on tv" if you did that

Post by **snarl** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 1:43 pm

I would like to [composite word including 'f*ck'] Sam up the wrongun, I think she'd like that.

Then I'd walk around furiously wanking and swearing.

Impactor returns 2.0 · Post by **Impactor returns 2.0** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 3:15 pm

snarl wrote:I would like to **** Sam up the wrongun, I think she'd like that.

Then I'd walk around furiously wanking and swearing.

you see this years housemates have nothing on our Snarl...

[composite word including 'f*ck'] me seriously, last night I turned off because ive never heard so much bitching in my whole life...