You think you got it bad? Turns out I was a hippy in this life.Karl Lynch wrote:I think I was a hippy in a former life.
Dammit.
Anyway, as I hinted earlier, choosing between Christianity and Islam is like choosing between a giant douche and a turd sandwich, and while I'd rather have a giant douche over a turd sandwich, it's largely irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.
And I said I would stop this sort of thing, but I've been drinking and I need to clear a couple of things up.
In the religion of Islam, the prophet Mohammed was just a man, albeit the head of a religion, and infallible. In Catholicism, the pope is just a man, albeit the head of a religion, and infallible. Both have their own personal hotline to God. For Muslims to display big old banners saying that the pope will burn in hell, as I have seen a great many in the press lately, is equivalent to Christians holding big old banners saying that Mohammed is burning in hell.
Stop me if I'm wrong. Please.
Not that I particularly care or anything. Bring on the holy war and let the Christians, Sikhs, Muslims, Hindus and all the rest fight it out over whose god is better, because whatever the result, the only outcome will be that there are less religious people in the world, and that can only be a good thing. My only worry is that one of the religions might actually win and the atheists who sat on the fence will have to listen to whichever crazed cleric takes over. Either that or the fact that a member of one of these religions actually believes that I give a [composite word including 'f*ck'] one way or the other and kills me because of it, or he kills me because I don't give a [composite word including 'f*ck'] and his religion gives him a mandate to smite all the nonbelievers. I'm looking at you here, Islam.
And I'll tell you all this for nothing: No-one in history ever went into a war with the devil on their side. Think on.
As a humourous aside, I stared down a preacher in Oxford Circus the other day, just listening to exactly what she was saying through her megaphone, nodding and occasionally laughing, and she actually packed up and left. I managed to scare her wrath of god ass away without even saying a single word. Afterwards I asked, "Is that it?" and she was all like, "What do you mean, is that it?" I said, "Is that it? I was enjoying that," and she hurried away saying "I have to go now." I swear, I'ma go back there and see if she has the balls to come back, because she was like the JWs I encountered the other week. They don't even have the strength of their convictions and they probably know **** all about their own religion.
As a second humourous aside, I've started attending a church service in Camden.
Don't ****ing laugh.
It's a multi-denominational (which kind of includes me, broadly) service of silent meditation. No-one says a word. No priest telling you what to do. No holy book. No bull-****ing-****. Just half an hour a week to go and be spiritual with a bunch of other people, without them telling you about how much they believe in their god and how much their god loves them and the rest of the self-justification you usually have to put up with. Half an hour to spend time with yourself and your thoughts and to contemplate your place in the universe*. That's the way forward.
* lately I have come to terms with my place in the universe, and that I will die and that the afterlife is most likely an invention of whatever religion wants to stake a claim on it. I'm thinking about moving to New Zealand where I will run an organic farm with my girl at my side and we'll sing, sing, sing....