Transformers 30 Review: Spoilers

Professor Smooth · Post by **Professor Smooth** » Thu Nov 17, 2011 2:30 pm

The ****?

Post by **Kaylee** » Thu Nov 17, 2011 3:29 pm

Again with the 'Oh suddenly everyone can read Galvatron's mind...'

Except now we've expanded it with: 'AND know stuff he doesn't!'

Words fail me.

As an additional, bonus annoyance: am I alone in finding Galvatron as a separate character (ie not Megatron) is just kinda... pointless? It's like introducing a character who is exactly like Unicron, but who wears a hat, and then making him a central character. Basically the story-telling equivalent of a repaint.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand, utter twaddle as usual. I think it's been written by some new Google tool that's spidered the web's collection of Transformers fiction and then assembled it on a descending scale based on lunacy of content.

Liking the Vector Sigma crap, too. I miss cartoon references so obvious that they could trip a foot-sure elephant. Whilst it was lying down.

Also liking the Matrix as dues-ex-machina cure all once again. Got some problem or other? Don't worry, one swig of Ol' Doc Prime's Matrix Juice is good for what ails you. Mega computer corrupted by some Heart of Testicles nonsense? Unicron nibbling your planetary rings? Fridge door stuck? Guzzle on down some Matrix and everything'll be hunky dorey. Just like the Bowie album.

Oi vey.

DJ_Convoy · Post by **DJ_Convoy** » Thu Nov 17, 2011 4:26 pm

"The ****?" may be the greatest review of this series that I've ever seen.

One issue to go, ladies and gents. One issue to go. Then we never have to speak of Costa again (or the possible Google app pretending to be a writer- whichever). Don't let the, uh, egress portal hit you on the, ah, reactor linkage on your way out. Or something like that.

Karl- I thought at first it was neat having Galvatron as a seperate enitity, but, since he's basically a different character everytime we see him, I'd say the novelty has worn off. Once again, Furman's G1 run had the right idea- time lost madman verison of Megs from an alternate future... and then time lost madman version of Megs from an alternate future who can be slightly reasoned with.

Professor Smooth · Post by **Professor Smooth** » Thu Nov 17, 2011 11:11 pm

Review of the last 30 issues of IDW's TF comics:

Some Transformers stay on Earth.
Most of the Transformers decide to return to Cybertron.
The few Transformers that stayed on Earth declare the entire thing to have been a confusing waste of time.
Huge big-bad attacks Cybertron but is defeated when Prime uses the Matrix.

Post by **Kaylee** » Fri Nov 18, 2011 2:16 am

It's close, you just missed out Spike's crucial, Shakespearean blah blah blah.

His blah blah blah was apparently a story that had to be told.

@DJ yeah, I think separate Galvy works on paper. The writer just needs to be capable of giving him a distinct, recognisable personality other than a minor variation on Megatron/stereotypical raving Decepticon.

Hound · Post by **Hound** » Fri Nov 18, 2011 11:46 am

[composite word including 'f*ck'] me, that was crap.

Considering how 'Chaos' was sold as some massive event, that was a spectacular anti-climax.

Post by **Best First** » Fri Nov 18, 2011 1:41 pm

i thought the page that was a shot of nothing but jizz was a good acknowlegement of what a load of old wank this has been

Predabot · Post by **Predabot** » Fri Nov 18, 2011 2:00 pm

So... Are the new good series going to start next month?

Please say it is so...

DJ_Convoy · Post by **DJ_Convoy** » Fri Nov 18, 2011 4:02 pm

Yup. Death of Optimus by James, Nick and John Barber in December, and the two new books launch outta that in January.

Then, presumably, 81 in May or June (and hopefully 80.5 'round Free Comic Day).

Brighter days ahead, guys.

Professor Smooth · Post by **Professor Smooth** » Sat Nov 19, 2011 4:08 am

I just can't get over this.

"Chaos" was hyped to the gills. Press releases, interviews with major comic book websites, early-release promo art, bi-weekly schedule, the whole nine yards.

And yet, the climax appears, for all the world, to have been "The Matrix is used to destroy a giant robotic demigod that's attacking Cybertron...and Optimus Prime may be dead."

I really don't think I'm entering "whiny, entitled fanboy" territory when I express that I'm a bit miffed at having paid between four and twelve bucks a month for a story that ends the same way as Transformers: The Movie did back in 1986.

Meanwhile, the entire "back on Earth" bit ended with that "this has been nothing but a long, confusing mess" bit.

Post by **Kaylee** » Sat Nov 19, 2011 10:33 am

K, trust me, it's a google-bot. They've written a program that spiders the Internet for nonsensical twaddle and then packages it into a comic costing $6 (plus applicable tax and postage).

It's the best scheme since Scrooge McDuck decided to hide all his cash in a gigantic skyscraper with a $ on the side.

Yaya · Post by **Yaya** » Sun Nov 20, 2011 3:57 am

Well, I found this issue an improvement from the last few. Mainly because they, quite obviously, went out of their way to try to explain to the reader what the hell was unfolding on their pages.

So yeah, now I know what's going on. And what's going on is chaos. Not chaos in the cool,cataclysmic, out-of-your-seat, ****-hitting-the-fan kind of way.

No, this is chaos in the "is that really ****....hitting a fan..." kind of way that has you out of your seat as you try to dodge pieces of said **** splattering against your face.

That kind of chaos.

So yeah, I give them that, that they stayed true to title assigned to this.

Post by **snarl** » Mon Nov 21, 2011 3:45 pm

hmm.

Nice pictures. Bit silly. All over now anyway, roll on the new year.

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Mon Nov 21, 2011 5:25 pm

snarl wrote:hmm.

Nice pictures. Bit silly. All over now anyway, roll on the new year.

And let's just assume the new year is coming straight out of '07.

Post by **Best First** » Tue Nov 22, 2011 11:42 am

Can i also just go on record and say that all the people who say Costa has a gift for dialogue are taling out of their arses.

The tripe these guys come out with, some of which seems intended to be humerous but which is actually about as funny as a pro-life coffee morning, is dreadful.

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Sat Nov 26, 2011 2:19 am

Oh Primus, this comic is ******* hilarious. The times Costa mocks his own writing makes me think the guy is either a genius, or he was trying to mock other TF comics and made himself look especially toolish.

"It's like a massive infodump!"

"Hey, maybe the universe is in jeopardy like, every day..."

Not to mention the ENTIRELY WHITE PAGE.