Much Ado About Megatron #5 Review (SPOILERS)

[Impactor returns 2.0]

this thread makes me smile...

[sprunkner]

Yeah, the identical review thing kind of got you.

Although given BF's admission of "I miss the idiot," I think you're officially un-banned. Though still an idiot. I think. (Are you?)

I am getting a Master's degree in Creative Writing

which makes me

USELESS!

(goes back to writing unpublished novel #4... or possibly 5... lost track)

[Best First]

It means he is officially an idoit.

The only way he can unidiot himself is to say "I am a Furmanite" 100 times and then swear to never use the word again.

FACT.

[Sunyavadin]

It's annoying, as SOME of the TF characterisation in the latest few issues is good, particularly with the autobots, but the humans are ATROCIOUSLY cardboard, and the 'cons too cartoony for the most part...

[Jack Cade]

Really? I find the Autobots' 'chacterisation' to be equally bad, amounting to, "Me Grumpy", "Me Toolman", "Me Toughguy" etc.

One of the biggest problems with AHM is not only is there very little in the way of plot but total confusion as to what the plot drivers are supposed to be. Successful stories signal very clearly who you should be watching - for all the characters it introduced, Infiltration's events were entirely driven by three humans, three Autobots (Ratchet, Prowl and Bumblebee) and two Decepticons (Megatron and Starscream - the others only really serving as SS's lackeys).

By contrast, in AHM, just in the human camp we've been led on at least two wild goose chases already. Andy's the one to watch - oh, now he's dead. Colonel Witwicky's the man with the plan - oh, he's done [composite word including 'f*ck'] all. Now it's Spike and random Afro-American guy, both of whom, coming up to the half way point, have also done [composite word including 'f*ck'] all.

As for the Decepticons, we don't even know what their plan is beyond trashing everything. They might as well be b-movie aliens for all the story going on there.

Which leaves the Autobots, and again, total confusion to who the key players are meant to be. Is Mirage important? God knows - we've not heard a peep out of him. Kup? Well, he's turned up, but it's not clear what point that serves. Jazz? He knows kung fu and he's in charge and ... err ... what else?

In summary, I don't think I've ever read any story that spends so long just setting the table.

[Yaya]

Really? I find the Autobots' 'chacterisation' to be equally bad, amounting to, "Me Grumpy", "Me Toolman", "Me Toughguy" etc.

Which leaves the Autobots, and again, total confusion to who the key players are meant to be. Is Mirage important? God knows - we've not heard a peep out of him. Kup? Well, he's turned up, but it's not clear what point that serves. Jazz? He knows kung fu and he's in charge and ... err ... what else?

In summary, I don't think I've ever read any story that spends so long just setting the table.

On that last point, I have to agree with you. I said it before, I'll say it again. AHM makes Infiltration look like Revelations in the pacing department.

Regarding the Autobots, it's funny. I found the last two issues of AHM to be right up my alley. (snarlz would say right up my ass).

I loved the Autobot interaction the last two issues, and in contradiction to Jack's dislike of there not being a pivotal Autobot, I actually find this to be the strongest aspect of it.

What I mean is, the last two issues have succeeded in giving a number of Autobots just the right amount of characterization they needed to play a crucial role in the story. They feel like a team. If something happens to, say Wheeljack or Cliffjumper now, it will actually mean something. Mirage, Hot Rod, Cliffjumper, Wheeljack, Prowl, Jazz, Springer, Ironhide, Bumblebee have all had some screen time, and not in a Marvel-here's who I am and here's what my weapon does- sort of way.

As far as the human criticism goes...ugh. It's been bad. I will say, though, that there have been some good Con moments with them that kind of harken back to old horror movies, like Astrotrain coming down the tunnel and the whole Ratbat thing. Those scenes were kind of spooky fun. The Frenzy scene was cool too.

Had the first three issues been rolled into one, I would be showering this series with praise, and in turn, pissing all who post here off.

So there are things to be thankful for, children.

[sprunkner]

Had the first three issues been rolled into one, I would be showering this series with praise, and in turn, pissing all who post here off.

I dunno... I think most of us would be a little more amicable to the story.

I'm still not seeing "I am a Furmanite..."

[Yaya]

Had the first three issues been rolled into one, I would be showering this series with praise, and in turn, pissing all who post here off.

I dunno... I think most of us would be a little more amicable to the story.

I'm still not seeing "I am a Furmanite..."

I....am...... ....I......am....a.... .......I....am...a...Ffff.....I'm Batman!

[Guest]

I....am...... ....I......am....a.... .......I....am...a...Ffff.....I'm Batman!

What? How can Batman be an Ophthalmologist? What does he do all day? Correct his patients' myopia by flattening their eyes slightly with a few poundings of his trusty Batarang?

And where's Batman's obligatory post to contradict the above anyway?

[Yaya]

Correct his patients' myopia by flattening their eyes slightly with a few poundings of his trusty Batarang?

Hey, remember the skepticism when the laser was first introduced?

I call it....BASIK. Batarang-Assisted in-Situ Keratomileusis.

Still working out the kinks, y'know...shortage of test subjects and all.

[Guest]

Hmm. Laser, Acronym, Need for human victims... err, volunteers, Period-heavy ellipsis.

Sounds like you'd be more of a Batman villain, of the mad scientist breed, than Batman. With Reflector as your henchmen!

[Best First]

What I mean is, the last two issues have succeeded in giving a number of Autobots just the right amount of characterization they needed to play a crucial role in the story. They feel like a team. If something happens to, say Wheeljack or Cliffjumper now, it will actually mean something. Mirage, Hot Rod, Cliffjumper, Wheeljack, Prowl, Jazz, Springer, Ironhide, Bumblebee have all had some screen time, and not in a Marvel-here's who I am and here's what my weapon does- sort of way.

No, more in a "Here's who i am and here's how my techspec/sun bow says i should act"

Well gosh darn i am a grumpy old timer!
Hmm, i'm an absent minded scientist!
I like fighting!
I'm a traitor!
Er, i'm also a grumpy old timer! Prime doensn't keep me around for my looks kid - that's right - i called you kid, i am OLD!
I'm an impetuous youth! Despite previous reinvention to the contrary
We're brothers! We loiter in the same space from scene to scene!
And we are all total tarts without Optimus Prime!

[Sunyavadin]

They need Grimmers back to beat 'em all back in line.

[Yaya]

Well gosh darn i am a grumpy old timer!
Hmm, i'm an absent minded scientist!
I like fighting!
I'm a traitor!
Er, i'm also a grumpy old timer! Prime doensn't keep me around for my looks kid - that's right - i called you kid, i am OLD!
I'm an impetuous youth! Despite previous reinvention to the contrary
We're brothers! We loiter in the same space from scene to scene!
And we are all total tarts without Optimus Prime!

I'll take it!

[Brendocon]

As for the Decepticons, we don't even know what their plan is beyond trashing everything. They might as well be b-movie aliens for all the story going on there.

Yes. And this is my biggest problem right now. More than the complete absence of any actual events, more than the apparent disregard for everything that's gone before, more than the fact all the human characters have the exact same face.

The Decepticons have defeated the Autobots. Thanks to Devastator and some mysterious access codes acquired thanks to an as-yet unidentified 'bot. Megatron has the Matrix. So what do they do? They... attack Earth!

Why now?

Is it for the Ore-13? Is it because Starscream had already done such sterling work seeding the planets' governments with Facsimile Clones, thus making it an easy job? Is it because their presence had been rumbled a year ago so why the hell not?

These are all perfectly viable explanations for why they've chosen to occupy our planet -- which prior to Infiltration seemed widely regarded as a backwater nowhere assignment to keep Starscream out of trouble -- all of which really require no more than one line of throwaway dialogue.

But no. It's "ZOMG NO TEH DECEPTICONS ARE ATTACKING EARTH!!!!11". And we're just meant to accept it and take it at face value.

Best as I can see, the only real motivation for why they're here is "because that's where most of the pre-movie cartoon happened."

The pre-McCarthy stuff worked massively hard to establish the conflict on an intergalactic scale, with each location just being one tiny aspect of the ongoing struggle. Now we're focussed solely on the mindless subjugation of one tiny inhabited planet... without the slightest indication as to why.

Why not attack Nebulos? I'm sure Thunderwing didn't destroy the entire world. It's not like there was just the one city, surely?

As it stands, it's a bit like "I have defeated Galactus! Now watch, as I effortlessly invade.... Fiji! The Moon! And Scarborough!"

But let's not worry about that because Drift's a ninja and Kup has a robocigar. And the Decepticons are kewl, man!!!!!

Rubbish.

[Batman]

I....am...... ....I......am....a.... .......I....am...a...Ffff.....I'm Batman!

No.

I'm the goddamn Batman.

[Best First]

Well gosh darn i am a grumpy old timer!
Hmm, i'm an absent minded scientist!
I like fighting!
I'm a traitor!
Er, i'm also a grumpy old timer! Prime doensn't keep me around for my looks kid - that's right - i called you kid, i am OLD!
I'm an impetuous youth! Despite previous reinvention to the contrary
We're brothers! We loiter in the same space from scene to scene!
And we are all total tarts without Optimus Prime!

I'll take it!

From Pat Lee. Hard and often.

for shame.

[Cattleprod]

Ugh. People like Skwege get a free pass to act like vicious little shits because they suck up to the management.

[stranger]

Brendocon's thread summed everything up far better than I could... however - you realise Denton is going to hunt you down and make you pay for your insolence...

[Best First]

Hmm. Before this turns into a full on board war - lets just focus on discussing what we do and don't (cough) like about the series.

Acknolwedging that the state of that forum is a joke and the moderation is ridiculous and certain posters ruin it for everyone else.

But that covers it doesn't it?

That's me trying to be responsible by the way - apologies for any confusion this may cause.

And welcome CP.

EDIT - just seen Jack was banned - **** it - go hog wild.

[Jack Cade]

Well, I'm pretty pissed off with DanielW's response on that IDW thread. It's such a bunch of party line claptrap.

"FWIW the banning of a forum member is not an action taken lightly nor without consideration or consultation with the appropriate people."

For 'consideration or consultation ' read 'telling them they're in trouble and on warning and completely ignoring any rejoinder'. It's not a two-way discussion - it's 'quiet down or hop it'.

"We did not single out Jack for expulsion to "make an example of him".
His actions led to his "posting holiday"."

'Posting holiday?' That's as bad as 'collateral damage'! I was told "You are no longer welcome here".

"And he was given fair warning from both the Moderators and the Administration. In addition to the same warnings we all have been given, he was contacted via PM to remind him of what is expected of someone posting here."

We all know what total bollocks this concept of 'what is expected of someone posting here' is. I started a thread asking for clarification and it was swiftly locked. My PM warning was for writing "Oh, come off it", which was apparently 'rude to Shaun' (it was actually a reply to Richter). It's obvious that the offence wasn't towards Richter but towards DJT himself, since my 'come off it' was disagreeing with Richter's assertion that DJT had single-handedly improved the mood of the site.

I've told them umpteen times - Ryall, DJT and in public - that I have a very different understanding of what it means to be 'polite' than they obviously have, that I consider some of their behaviour an abuse of their position and well deserving of rebuke and that I'm not going to play ball just to avoid reprisals from a couple of demagogues. They refuse to engage in any discussion about this and merely repeat their nonsensical mantra at me about wanting a 'civil' forum.

I should also mention, because this is bound to come up, that I told DJT to 'go [composite word including 'f*ck'] yourself' in an email following my 'posting holiday' notification. However, I did say it in the context of telling him 'All that remains is for me to retrospectively give your actions some kind of justification by doing something genuinely wrong' and most of the email was in a much more general tone (which is a bit of a copout on my part - I'm torn between the philosophies of not sinking to the level of personal insults and 'to hell with it, say how you feel', and inevitably I'll have played it completely wrong and end up with the worst of both worlds).

[snarl]

Not so long ago, this board wasn't that far off the IDW board.

The beauty of this place though is that we were fair with the banter. I dont mind having a bit of it but on the IDW board it's one sided.

The thing I get is that a lot of the Comic fans tend to think they're dealing with ******* mongs when it comes to trying to debate the comic with the toon fans - I definitely do - and you tonalise your posts that way. I can't remember the time when I gave up trying to be polite and decided I'd just be a sardonic **** to certain people but I think it was probably in November 2000. The thing is, I think as long as you're making a valid point over here, people wont even mind if you get all cynical or sarcastic, or decide to throw in the odd snidey little "your mum's a slag" remark.

But cause of that, a lot of the little lambs lacking in cutting edge banter and harassment skills and general taking it like a manability decided to [composite word including 'f*ck'] off to Seibertron, which is good for them and me.

IDWs board policy seems to be slap gagging orders on the complainers. Up to them innit, but I think they'll drive away all their best posters.

[Yaya]

EDIT - just seen Jack was banned

It's funny cause it's not me.

[arkonseal]

So can anyone sum up what happened, since I apparently slept through this exciting time on the IDW forums? Was there a thread that ticked them off (and was subsequently deleted)?

[snarl]

Its just been brewing for a while.

AHM has gotten it in the neck from a lot of fairly articulate people, with nothing decent released in the interim to cover up its guffness.

So it's eared IDW some real, consistent criticism, which I think coming off the back of a love fest has got some of the creators' backs up.

Then there are just a load of ***** who think it's good, they're the kind of happy, clappy vocal minority ****s that piss everyone else off... So throw it all into the melting pot, leave to stew for about 4 months...

And there's been some flare ups.

[Cattleprod]

They're still bringing out that reliable standby, "people only prefer Maximum Dinobots to All Hail Megatron because of the writer's name".

I've given it some thought, and I think I understand why that HAS to be the official party line. If there's no bias, and people genuinely like the OLD direction better on its own merits, that means the NEW direction is a failure. I figure even they realize they'd get caught if they tried to claim AHM was getting the more favorable response, so they wave around this bias excuse.

[snarl]

who's saying that, buying public or the actual creators?

If its IDW people, that's quite dismissive and shows a lack of respect to Furman does it not?

[Cattleprod]

who's saying that, buying public or the actual creators?

This particular instance that set me off was a regular poster. I don't quite feel up to digging through dozens of pages of multiple threads to find more examples.

What I mean is, IDW literally CAN'T state that MD is getting a better response than AHM, they'd lose too much face. It would mean admitting that their current long range plan isn't perfect and flawless. We'll never actually hear anyone 'in the know' say as much until years later, when they're probably no longer connected to the company.

Right now they're saying the second half of AHM will tie in closer to Furman's stories and that was the plan all along, but it REALLY sounds like damage control to me.

[snarl]

Yeah, I thought the same thing when I read that press release too.

[Brendocon]

They're still bringing out that reliable standby, "people only prefer Maximum Dinobots to All Hail Megatron because of the writer's name".

[composite word including 'f*ck'] them then. I don't prefer it because of the writer, I prefer it because it's a better comic. More's happened in the first issue of MD than the first five of All Hail. FACT.

I'd give the first issue of both to somebody who's not a TF fan to get their opinion, but it'd be pointless. Fact is the opening chapter of AHM's probably a better #1 than MD's... but the first issue of MD isn't an #1, it's an #42. So they're incomparable.

My opinion of the writer's got nothing to do with it. Alan Moore's a precious little lunatic, but it doesn't stop him being a ******* genius. I can cope with McCarthy being a cock if his comic's good. It isn't. And I'm still at a loss as to how somebody who'd never written for the franchise before got given a 12-issue gig writing the flagship series as his first assignment.