Optimus or Boobs?

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Sat Oct 27, 2012 4:22 am

My son discovered my Masterpiece Prime in truck form today. Despite it being a hefty burden for a two-year-old, he hasn't put it down all day. BIG TRUCK BIG TRUCK BIG TRUCK!

It was time for his nightly nip of breast milk, which he has yet to catch on is in dwindling supply, and Mrs. Bumblemus put her foot down--he had to set Optimus down to get boobs. Otherwise you get Masterpiece Prime shoved in a tender stomach area.

This was a serious crisis. Imagine, if you will, a young (young) man, clinging to Masterpiece Prime, staring in longing at breasts, but unwilling to put down the toy, weeping for the agony of such a choice.

Kind of a metaphor for certain periods of my life, really.

inflatable dalek · Post by **inflatable dalek** » Sat Oct 27, 2012 8:35 am

Well, in a choice between Optimus Prime and suckling on my mothers boobs, I'd probably go for the toy.

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Sun Oct 28, 2012 12:19 am

That's weird. Heck, when the US series was canceled and I was the tender age of 11, I know how my mom comforted me.

inflatable dalek · Post by **inflatable dalek** » Sun Oct 28, 2012 12:21 am

That's how your Mom comforted me as well.

I'm sorry. So, so sorry...

Yaya · Post by **Yaya** » Mon Oct 29, 2012 3:38 am

Sunyavadin · Post by **Sunyavadin** » Mon Oct 29, 2012 4:50 am

I get to play with my girlfriend's WHILE she reads Transformers, and she regularly gropes mine in an attempt to get my attention while I'm transforming my TFs.

Metal Vendetta · Post by **Metal Vendetta** » Mon Oct 29, 2012 8:46 am

If it's a choice between Optimus and boobs, they're clearly the wrong boobs. Find some other boobs that don't mind Optimus so much.

inflatable dalek · Post by **inflatable dalek** » Mon Oct 29, 2012 8:51 am

Starscream has a great pair on him.

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Mon Oct 29, 2012 9:02 pm

inflatable dalek wrote:Starscream has a great pair on him.

He's also got the "nosecone." A little of everything. No wonder things are so tense between he and Megatron.

Shanti418 · Post by **Shanti418** » Mon Oct 29, 2012 9:33 pm

bumblemusprime wrote:
inflatable dalek wrote:Starscream has a great pair on him.
He's also got the "nosecone." A little of everything. No wonder things are so tense between he and Megatron.

Been there, read the fanfic, got the scars.

Honestly though, the compromise between them is obvious. What is a Transformer, has a great rack on him (G1, at least), AND transforms into a huge phallic gun?

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Tue Oct 30, 2012 12:04 am

Shanti418 wrote:
bumblemusprime wrote:
inflatable dalek wrote:Starscream has a great pair on him.
He's also got the "nosecone." A little of everything. No wonder things are so tense between he and Megatron.
Been there, read the fanfic, got the scars.

Honestly though, the compromise between them is obvious. What is a Transformer, has a great rack on him (G1, at least), AND transforms into a huge phallic gun?

[barrywhite] Shockwave did it. [/barrywhite]

Post by **Kaylee** » Tue Oct 30, 2012 9:29 am

I've never been more embarrassed to be seen with you characters.

Yaya · Post by **Yaya** » Tue Oct 30, 2012 10:18 pm

Not many threads make me feel uncomfortable.

This thread makes me feel uncomfortable.

saysadie · Post by **saysadie** » Wed Oct 31, 2012 3:18 am

...

*slow clap*