Worst joke you've ever heard

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Wed Sep 22, 2010 2:08 am

Q: "What do you get when you put a baby in a blender?"

A: "I don't know about you, but I get an erection!"

Post by **Kaylee** » Wed Sep 22, 2010 9:29 am

Ah oldies but (disturbing) goldies.

I know a few others but knowing how searchable/permanent/traceable content is on the Internet now I'll keep quiet and tasteful.

Smug and cheeky, yes. But tasteful

Post by **Best First** » Wed Sep 22, 2010 10:38 am

$5 for an hour with Spencer's mum.

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What's Maddie an anagram of?

I'm dead

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After lunch the Pope and the cardinals will be passing round the under eights

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Gary Glitter is en route to Chile, apparently the news of 33 trapped and helpless minors was too temtping to ignore

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Optimus Prime Rib · Post by **Optimus Prime Rib** » Wed Sep 22, 2010 12:49 pm

bumblemusprime wrote:Q: "What do you get when you put a baby in a blender?"

A: "I don't know about you, but I get an erection!"

Ive heard a different version of this one and its much much worse.

"Whats the sound of 2 babies in a blender?"
"I dont know either I was too busy masturbating"

Worst joke ever:

Q: How do you make a 4 year old cry twice?
A: Wipe your dick off on their teddy bear.

I need a shower now.

IronHide · Post by **IronHide** » Wed Sep 22, 2010 6:03 pm

The only one that really makes me cringe.

-Whats the best part about having sex with a 13 year old girl in the shower? You can slick her hair back and make her look 7. -

I'll omit the racist ones as the CP and dead babies will more than likely be as far as this goes.

Shanti418 · Post by **Shanti418** » Wed Sep 22, 2010 7:09 pm

OK, I'll bring us back to the PG kick:

Two crackers were walking down the street. One was assalted.

Impactor returns 2.0 · Post by **Impactor returns 2.0** » Thu Sep 23, 2010 10:40 am

9/10 enjoy gang rape

Post by **Best First** » Thu Sep 23, 2010 3:06 pm

lets skip the racist stuff

Obfleur · Post by **Obfleur** » Thu Sep 23, 2010 8:35 pm

How do you make a cat sound like a dog?

Pour petrol on it -> ignite -> WOOF.

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Tue Mar 15, 2011 6:01 pm

Don't know how I forgot this one. WARNING: Emvee will really like it.

Do you believe in Tapioca Jesus?

After he comes into your heart, he comes into your hair.

Metal Vendetta · Post by **Metal Vendetta** » Wed Mar 16, 2011 8:50 am

How do you get a gay man to shag your girlfriend?
Sh*t in her c*nt.

What's got one ball and f*cks women?
Peter Sutcliffe's hammer.

What do you call a woman with three c*nts?
The Black Eyed Peas.

Professor Smooth · Post by **Professor Smooth** » Wed Mar 16, 2011 11:09 am

What's the difference between a truckload of bricks and a truckload of dead babies?

You can't unload a truckload of bricks with a pitchfork.

THAT'S TERRIBLE! DEAD BABY JOKES?!?! NOT COOL!

Fine, fine. What's the difference between a truckload of bricks and a truckload of live babies...

Shanti418 · Post by **Shanti418** » Wed Mar 16, 2011 6:45 pm

Metal Vendetta wrote: What do you call a woman with three c*nts?
The Black Eyed Peas.

I just busted out laughing at that one. It's funny 'cause it's true.

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Wed Mar 16, 2011 8:32 pm

Shanti418 wrote:
Metal Vendetta wrote: What do you call a woman with three c*nts?
The Black Eyed Peas.
I just busted out laughing at that one. It's funny 'cause it's true.

Me too. Then I told it to the missus and the cultural difference in the use of "the C-word" didn't translate.

Shanti418 · Post by **Shanti418** » Thu Mar 17, 2011 12:01 am

bumblemusprime wrote:
Shanti418 wrote:
Metal Vendetta wrote: What do you call a woman with three c*nts?
The Black Eyed Peas.
I just busted out laughing at that one. It's funny 'cause it's true.
Me too. Then I told it to the missus and the cultural difference in the use of "the C-word" didn't translate.

Yeah, I'm slightly unsure as to whether my wife would approve of me finding that funny, and I'm most definitely sure my gender & sexuality sociological colleagues would NOT approve. But there was a time when I was a freshman in college when The Roots, The Black Eyed Peas, and Outkast were like the vanguard of a return to intelligent hip hop, and out of the three, BEP has certainly fallen from grace the most completely, and it's all Fergie's fault.

saysadie · Post by **saysadie** » Thu Mar 17, 2011 12:20 am

I don't find any of this funny at all.

I might be lying. :o I almost lost a mouthful of coffee in class at one point. The chick in front of me would probably not have enjoyed that.

bumblemusprime · Post by **bumblemusprime** » Thu Mar 17, 2011 6:55 am

I find the "truckloads of dead babies" stuff pretty damn hilarious. And I did chuckle at the "under eights," for all that I winced at the same time.

But Tapioca Jesus is just the worst best thing ever.

Anyway, here's another one:

A man visits his favorite whorehouse. "I'm bored," he said. "I've had every kind of sex you can have with the whores here and I just need something new."

"Well," the madam said, "we just got a new girl. She's got a glass eye and if you ask nice she'll take it out for you."

Well, the man the whore had a nice time with the eye socket. When he was finished, he said "This was really great. I'll come back and see you again if you don't mind."

"Not at all. I'll keep an eye out for you."

BA-DUM TISS!

TransFans.co.uk

Worst joke you've ever heard

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