Aaron's Movie Ramblings (Spoilers aplenty)

[Aaron Hong]

So's we don't clog up the chatbox. Reply or not, it's up to you.

So some time last week they started showing trailers on TV for Final Destination 2, which was when I realised that I couldn't remember if Final Destination 1 was ever on TV. Turns out that conveniently they'd scheduled FD 1 just two days before FD 2 at a nice little graveyard slot, so I made some instant noodles, sat down, watched and ate.*

By the time the weekend came around and I was watching Final Destination 2, the significance of having the first movie just two days before came through as all the back-references to the movie that otherwise would be lost came to light.** Since nearly everyone knows about that business, though, I'll instead talk about how Final Destination itself, why it should qualify as a horror movie.

'But Aaron, these people only die from stupid accidents! What kind of horror movie does that?'

Well, readers, this is a story that goes back to the very birth of moviemaking. Ever since some '40s black-and-white screen diva wore her corset too tight and took a screaming fall straight into the camera, moviemakers have realised the power of bringing horror to the big screen. With great power comes great responsibility of course, and because of that, pretty much every horror movie in existence carries some form of cautionary tale. For example:

DRACULA: If you need a place for the night, and the locals tell you 'don't go to the castle', f--king DON'T GO TO THE CASTLE.
THE MUMMY: Graverobbing = bad.
PSYCHO: Don't check into a motel alone if you think the motel owner seems a little unhinged.
THE RING: If any of your relatives dies a mysterious death, please leave the investigations to the police. At the same time, check ahead to see if your motel was built over any potentially unstable foundations, like if there's a well right underneath one of the rooms or something.
DAWN OF THE DEAD: In the event of a zombie apocalypse, save the last bullet for yourself.***

There you go. And Final Destination does carry its own cautionary tale as well - not just the obvious 'arrange your sh-t neatly to prevent accidents', but, and this is important, 'learn to recognise any signs that may indicate that you need to arrange your sh-t neatly to prevent accidents'. With horror-worthy death scenes to drive said point home.

Final Destination. Watch... and learn.


* Yes, I eat through horror movies. Don't be surprised.
** It was pretty cheap how they explained Alex away with a falling brick though - and how come that doesn't pop up among the FD 2 survivors' backstories? Afro-man was transferred at the same time as FD 1's teacher, this one guy missed the train that beheaded Seann William Scott - was one of the FD 2 survivors supposed to work on Alex's roof or something?
*** Courtesy of Sean 'Shin-Goji' McGuinness, neomonsterisland.com.

[Aaron Hong]

For lord knows how long, Singapore TV's had this weekdaily afternoon slot dedicated to screening these old movies in the afternoons, and by old I don't mean Star Wars old or even black-and-white classics old, just some mostly obscure titles from that in-between phase (probably the 90s). I say mostly obscure because sometimes they do show some real gems in there. Like a certain war movie I've never sat down to watch in its entirety, and have remained ashamed for.

Memphis Belle.

Now, here we have a movie based on a historical event while claiming not to be 100% historically accurate - sound like a certain recent movie yet? Admittedly this is one movie that on the surface drew almost entirely on a huge cast of familiar names, some of which are more familiar in recent days - Matthew Modine (Cutthroat Island), Billy Zane (Titanic), Tate Donovan (Disney's Hercules), DB Sweeney (Spawn), Eric Stoltz (Anaconda), Harry Connick Jr (any good P2P service), Radio Rollins from Wing Commander III, High Commander Dick Solomon, Samwise Gamgee - and I still have no idea who David Strathairn is.

But once the action gets rolling, (apart from the somewhat improbable premise of the Belle returning before sundown), everything starts falling into place like a real war movie does. From the anticlimax involving the tomato soup can, to the German fighter getting shot and taking a bomber with it, even Sam's joke about the POW and his German captors. Having been assigned to an IFV myself, which involves manning a machine gun inside a cramped armored vehicle with 8 other soldiers, there's a scary number of parallels here...

...but not perhaps as scary as the fact that this isn't the last time Eric Stoltz co-stars with a singer/actor, takes a hit and gets laid up before the end of the movie. Check out 'Anaconda' one of these days.