Heartbroken

Metal Vendetta · Post by **Metal Vendetta** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 12:36 am

So I don't really have anyone to talk to about this

So it's you guys.

I saw Charla for quite possibly the last time today. She's going to Mexico for - in her own words - *shrug* for good. And I thought I'd cried all my tears for her.

I was ******* wrong. I saw her last week and I gave her her going-away present, which was a survival kit from my own personal stash. A torch, some purified water in sealed pouches, a heat blanket, an emergency whistle, the kind of stuff you only need in an emergency, because I realised that wherever she went in the world, I wanted her to be safe and ALIVE.

But tonight was more of a social thing. And I got too drunk, downed my pint (after several) and left over some stupid point of argument. She just callled me and now I'm a ******* mess again and I don't really know what to do. I know I should be happy for her, she's going on to live a great life as an English teacher and it will all work out great for her in Mexico but I can't help feeling I'm being all petty over stupid **** that won't even matter and the girl I'm with right now who gets back from NZ tomorrow won't even notice...

Aw [composite word including 'f*ck'] I don't even know what I'm trying to say. The fact that I'v managed to type this far and keep it coherent and not get the urge to delete everything so far is a ******* achievement in itself.

[composite word including 'f*ck']. The truth is that I still love her and I'll probably never see her again.

And that's the ******* truth of it all. Against the Tsunami and all that **** it seems so insignificnt and pointless. Well maybe that's the way things work.

5hit...

Optimus Prime Rib · Post by **Optimus Prime Rib** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 12:49 am

Emvee, if I can be of any help please let me know. If you need to talk in person or over IM Ill gladly give you my details buddy. Chin up mate.

Metal Vendetta · Post by **Metal Vendetta** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 12:59 am

Cheers Joey.

I think I'll be good. I just started smoking again and I got abottle of red wine to see me through the night...

Damn that girl won't ever know what she did to me.

But I'll get through it. Hell yeah. [composite word including 'f*ck'] I'm drunk

angloconvoy · Post by **angloconvoy** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 1:17 am

Sorry to hear it mate. If you need someone to talk, or drink, with then give me a bell. I was going to drop you a line tomorrow about my birthday anyway, as it goes.

Predabot · Post by **Predabot** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 1:19 am

What a bummer.

Sorry to hear that. I ussually don't give any replies to these sort of topics, since I've never had any romantical relationship, and really don't know much about that kind of pain, but this time I'm going to say something. This is probably a ****** advice, considering how nice and cosy you seem to have it with your current better half, but here goes. Your drunk, so I'll risk it:

I say, in the morning when your sober you call Charla and tell her exactly how you feel.

I think it's obious that you love her, and as such it may not be really right to be in a relationship with someone else, for you that is.

Have a good chat with her and see if she has any love left for you and take it from there.

And if you see each other again after that, you go striaght hom e to your current missus and tell her how you feel too.

I say it's for the better.

BTW: Is she perhasp from Mexico herself? Is that why she's going to go work there? Seems odd that someone would want to go work there unless there volunteers or got some family connections of some sort, cause according to all those people that come across the border you can hardly make ends meat at all there.

Post by **Best First** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 12:06 pm

Man i feel liek you have just given me an insight into my future the way i feel at the moment . So, if its any consolation, you ain't alone mate. (altho i apologise, as i know it isn't much consolation)

I take it she wouldn't be interested in you heading out there after her?

i will shout you a beer some time very soon - what are you doing on Friday?

Talk to us as much as you need.

Eline · Post by **Eline** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 12:34 pm

I don't think you will never see her again.

And still loving her doesn't mean you can't live happily ever after with the girl you're with at the moment. I know I will never stop loving Dylan, but I also know I have to get on with my life without him.

You could just call her, if you don't want that argument to be the last thing you've ever said to her. Maybe just say that you wish her much happiness and alive-ness, and that you will miss her.

Love is just very cruel.

*hug*

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 1:19 pm

She broke up with you and now she's leaving the country. There's not many positive vibes coming from her is there?

Moving on is hard but dwelling on things can be far more painful.

Try and stay friends though. It would be a shame after all you've shared together for it to end differently to that.

I've stuck my oar in. But all the best mate, you did get a rough time and you didn't deserve it.

Post by **Kaylee** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 3:46 pm

Oh Rob, you poor thing

Like everyone else said you've got us, and we're not a last resort by any stretch

We love you and will listen!

You sound like you've got a lot of issues regarding what she meant to you that you haven't dealt with... and probably don't even know you have. It would hurt, I know, to hear she was going but you sound absolutely gutted on a very deep level.

Why does it hurt so much to find she's going? Did you have some vague hope of getting back together? You can tell me, it'll just be you me and the rest of the English speaking world who will know

{hug} you be good, why not come to Canters and visit? I'll cheer you up

Obfleur · Post by **Obfleur** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 5:01 pm

Man I'm sorry to hear that

As Karl said "You sound like you've got a lot of issues regarding what she meant to you that you haven't dealt with".
Dealing with your feelings is really important to do.

I can't really express the things I want to say - but I'm really sorry to hear this. I hope you'll work everything out

Dylan · Post by **Dylan** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 7:01 pm

(Eline, you're a star. Thank you. Much love to you too.)

Rob, that's just horrible. I think I know how you feel. There's hardly anything I can say to help you though. Only you can find out what's important to you.

I wish you lots of strength and all the best. Take care, mate. You're an amazing person.

Shanti418 · Post by **Shanti418** » Thu Jan 06, 2005 7:02 pm

My condolences as well, Rob. It's amazing how some people will never know how much they mean to you: As the saying goes, "To the world, you may be one person, but to one person, you may be the world."

We're all here for you. Stay on the vino and smokes. The sun shall rise tomorrow.

The Last Autobot · Post by **The Last Autobot** » Fri Jan 07, 2005 3:24 am

I know how it pains to lose someone you love. How you think nothing will ever be the same. But a lot of times it works for the better. I can only add that Im confident youll feel better sooner or later.

Take care

Metal Vendetta · Post by **Metal Vendetta** » Fri Jan 07, 2005 2:53 pm

Well I called her and she knows exactly how I feel, and right now she's on the plane. I think I've drawn a line under it. I also talked to Sian (current gf) about a lot of it 'cause I didn't want to keep any of this from her and she was really supportive and told me that as long as I don't call her Charla by mistake then she'll be there for me when it's tough.

Much thanks to everyone for your words of support. I'm off the cigarettes again (which is hard going, but I'll get there) and I've now sobered up to the point where I can function in normal society again. Some advice for everyone: NEVER down a pint of extremely strong Pils lager and walk out, even if it is to prove a point. You will only regret it the next day, and the day after that.

You guys (and girls) are the best support group a person could have. I love you all, you know that.

Besty: sadly I'm booked this weekend for a wedding. We could catch up for a coupla jars next week though.

Karly: Lemme know when you're free and I'll drive over. Let's go and paint the Cathedral city red.

Post by **Best First** » Fri Jan 07, 2005 2:58 pm

just let me know when is good for you buddy.

sounds like you have hendled it all as well as you can. apart from the Pils.

love you too.

cheers

Legion · Post by **Legion** » Fri Jan 07, 2005 3:40 pm

hey mate, dunno what to say, i'm a bit crap in this kinda situation, but i really do hope it all works out for you dude.

Predabot · Post by **Predabot** » Fri Jan 07, 2005 3:41 pm

Metal Vendetta wrote:Well I called her and she knows exactly how I feel, and right now she's on the plane. I also talked to Sian (current gf) about a lot of it.

Good boy EmVee.

Some advice for everyone: NEVER down a pint of extremely strong Pils lager and walk out, even if it is to prove a point. You will only regret it the next day, and the day after that.

Dualy noted.