It ends for me after Energon and Binal Tech..

Ikijigoku · Post by **Ikijigoku** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 4:40 am

This post is more of a sad and an emtional one for me. I've been a Transfan since 1983 when I received my first Diaclone (Inferno). Now 21 years later, I find myself at 29 with an awesome Transformers collection, but nothing to show.

This past weekend my life came crashing down around me. It started first thing Saturday when I found out my place to live may be taken away. My father died six years ago and he left my mother the house in his will. It also stated that if she passes away, my sister and I get half of everything. As soon as my mother got the money both from the will and insurance she split to California. She left the house to my sister to keep up and I was forced to move out. Over time, I convinced my sister that I would move in and help her out. This is a decent house in Sterling Heights appraised at 170,000. Well, my sister decided along with my mother to sell the house. They both are doing this without considering where I will live. Well, I found out Saturday morning when a Century 21 agent came in with a cleaner.

Then, that night at work a waitress stole $671 from me. I run a restaurant. I had the pay the difference, and I came very close to losing my job. I really look bad in front of the head honchos. Especially, a week before my review. I've been working 60+ hours a week to get ahead. I did this for little pay and at the expense of my personal life. My girlfriend and I fought about this daily.

Then, my girlfriend came back from a Thanksgiving vacation and she decided to either end or take a break from our relationship. So it is true that bad things happen in 3's

My whole world came crashing down. Well, I've been an emotional mess for the last 3 days. I have nowhere to go and I have no direction. It is almost like I took a huge step backwards in my life. When I was a teen, I left home and I was on my own, homeless roaming Japan. Last year, the reason I moved back to Michigan from Chicago was to be with my girlfriend. I gave up a huge modeling job too.

Then I looked at why I'm in my situation. I am 29 years old, and I have nothing to show but a room of Transformers. It is a nice collection when I show it off to the Transformers community, but it is embarrassment outside. I get cracks about my habit all the time. My girlfriend did not like my habit, but I was too blind to understand why. I dragged her to the OFTCC on her birthday weekend. Transformers were that important to me. I was literly an addict. I needed to have them all. I spent thousands of dollars on my collection. After all this happened I think I can walk away and say the only positive thing out of this situatiuon is that I finally grew up. Afterchildhood, I collected video games, then TMNT, then Star Wars, then DVD's and then Transformers. It is nice to have a hobby, but do let it have you.

Today, I told her that I had nothing to show but this collection, and that I was considering selling off chunks of it. Surprising she told me I shouldn't because down the road I'll regret it. This coming from a girl that hates Transformers. I know that if I sell off my collection, I'd be able to pay off my $3000 credit card debt and even perhaps get a down payment for a house. Do I sacrifice my hard work for an easy solution? Once I finish school I can make up to 65000 a year. My advice to you collectors is don't get too enwrapped in collecting, you can be missing a lot more down the road. These things can't stay with you forever.

As I write this my girlfriend is the only remaining constant. We are not together for the right reason right now. She wants me to seek help. I've had issues with my family that may be affecting me. The whole situation that I wrote about the house is just an example. I left home at 17 years old while my family was in Japan. She feels that I need to love myself before I can love anyone else. SHe wants me to seek counseling. This is something I worked on tonight. I also am getting back into school next semester. I took a break this semester due to my demanding 60+ hour a week job. Once I pay off my credit card debt, I'll find a part time job. I hope I can work things out with her, but I think she is more concerned that I take care of myself first. She does not see us getting back together the way that we were. I was very selfish. When I transfer to Wayne State University in the fall, I'll get a loan. I guess the healthiest thng for me right now is to take one day at a time.

Post by **Computron** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 5:17 am

Iki, I wish nothing but the best for you. It may not sound like much now in the light of such troubles, but I'm being honest. I hope and pray things improve for you.

Best of luck mate.

Pissin' Poonani · Post by **Pissin' Poonani** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 5:25 am

Hey Iki, sorry things are so rough at the moment mate.

I'm not really sure what to say-one good thing is that you are being honest with yourself, and that will go a long way towards helping you get to where you want be, but for the here and now, I don't know. Do you have friends who could put you up until you find your feet again?

If you can help it, I wouldn't start selling off your collection unless it's very last resort. There's no shame in having a hobby you love, and you've realised that you've been a little blinded by it recently-I think that selling it off would be rubbing salt in your wounds. Could you put them into storage with someone you trust who has attic/basement space? It may make finding anew place easier if you don't have to find room for all of your TF's as well.

The work situation-well, sorry that to me is just hideously unfair. Someone steals $600 and YOU have to pay it back? Wasn't there enough proof that the girl in question did it-has she not been caught yet or something?

Give yourself time, and don't blame yourself for all that's gone wrong. Accepting responsibility is one thing, piling the blame for all that's gone wrong on your own shoulders will just get you depressed and leave you less able to turn things around to the way you'd like them to be.

You've always seemed like a nice guy to me Ik, sorry things are so rough at the moment. I really hope you get some good news soon. Take care.

Ikijigoku · Post by **Ikijigoku** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 6:36 am

Computron wrote:Iki, I wish nothing but the best for you. It may not sound like much now in the light of such troubles, but I'm being honest. I hope and pray things improve for you.

Best of luck mate.

Thanks a lot. That does mean a lot to me.

Poonami, it is up to the waitressr. If she's a big enough person, she'll return it.

I have thought about talking with a few people. I want to rent a room from someone I know. I don't feel living alone right now would be a wise decision. I am too much of a mess and being alone would put me in certain situaitons. When I called the counselor, she asked me if I wanted to go to the Emergancy room. She referred me to a couple of mental counseling institution. I'll contact them in the morning. If things do not get better by tommorrow, I go to the hospital. My ex is helping through it but the damage is pretty severe. It will take a considerable amount of time to heal.

Optimus Prime Rib · Post by **Optimus Prime Rib** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 7:38 am

For what its worth man, Im always here to talk. Couple hours away if you really need a shoulder to lean on.

Brendocon · Post by **Brendocon** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 10:16 am

Computron wrote:Iki, I wish nothing but the best for you. It may not sound like much now in the light of such troubles, but I'm being honest. I hope and pray things improve for you.

Best of luck mate.

What he said. Apart from the praying bit.

Best of luck.

Dylan · Post by **Dylan** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 10:48 am

Damn, Ken, that's just plain horrible.

In contrast to what others have said / may say: don't be afraid to part with your collection either. Transformers toys are very important to you, that much is obvious. But I personally honestly believe you are addicted to collecting. And any form of addiction can be dangerous.
From what you wrote, and have written on other occasions, I must say at times I think collecting Transformers doesn't make you happy (anymore).

Sounds like your girlfriend is quite a special and strong-willed person. Awesome.

Take care man, take one step at a time and listen to those you trust.

Dylan

Post by **Best First** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 12:06 pm

mmm, i think your hobby is only potentially an issue because of the situation you are in.

If everything esle was going swimmingly then you would maybe look at your TF collection and think 'cool'. However when life is not so good its easy to look at thema nd think 'what ****ing use is this pile of plastic'. When things aren't going well a TF collection morphs into a bizarre white elephant in my experience. In those situations ive considered jacking it all in (inclusing the online side) and having a more 'conventional' approach to life but i an't help but feel that that is a bit like morphing into a non entity - on of the crowd. I don't endevour to stand out (and people who do irk me soemwhat) but i don't want to be the kind of person who endevours to fit in either. If you enjoy it and it hurts no one, then its ok. end of. It sounds like you need to curb some excesses (the GF b'day thing is less than ideal...), but not neccs your hobby.

Take care, good luck and let is know if we can help.

Post by **Kaylee** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 12:19 pm

That's so bad...

I'm sorry to hear things are so low for you.

It's something I had pointed out to me a little while back and it seems certainly true, that we forget all things are only transient... we have them for a little while and then they go. It doesn't always stop us getting very attached to them and hurting badly when they do go, though.

I'd suggest, if I have any right to, that you might want to hang on to some of your collection. Naturally if you need money or whatever then even beloved possessions have to make way for the necessities to live- I've had to sell stuff before when times were tough, I'm sure most people have.

I do hear what you're saying... it's something I've thought about before. You look about you at your positively lowest ebb and try and find something worthwhile, something to make you feel like your time hasn't been wasted.

In your case its a room full of Transformers.

If its of any help, when one is that low and in that frame of mind, you're probably not likely to see what truly makes your existence 'justified', more than likely you'll just find something to blame yourself with- something to point your frustrations at for all the recent bad stuff that happened.

Don't punish yourself like that by getting rid of things you love.

Take care and take things slow. Objects, ultimately, are meaningless but if you want to get rid of them make sure its for the right reasons.

We're here for you.

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 2:00 pm

Take care Iki. I have nothing to add, just heed the wise words above.

Hound · Post by **Hound** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 8:42 pm

I don't think I can add anything to the wise words spoken above.

But i can give you a big virtual*hug*

Post by **Best First** » Tue Dec 28, 2004 10:08 am

Mmm. I'm starting to feel this.

After what happened with Rachel i'm suddenly finding mysefl wanting more money to sort my lifeout and the TFs suddenly seem like a bit of a burden - i've just canelled all my galaxy force pre-orders.

i think i may scale back to just g1 and Btech. i may sell off a load of BW, Armada, Energon etc - if i can be arsed.

i'm hoping its something that will pass but collecting the toys and comics just doesn't give me the joy it used to. bugger.

Hound · Post by **Hound** » Tue Dec 28, 2004 11:07 am

Try not to make any rash decisons matey.

Although I can't help but wonder what happens when I say, hit 30, and have a room full of toys....will I still love them?

Post by **spiderfrommars** » Tue Dec 28, 2004 11:29 am

Paulie

See your own advice above.

Makes a lot of sense...

Post by **Best First** » Tue Dec 28, 2004 8:43 pm

well i figure worst cae scenario i can pick up GF when it hits the UK, or get some US peeps to pick stuff up for me.

in the short term i would like some extra wedge towards sorting my life out.

i still love transfans.

Predabot · Post by **Predabot** » Fri Aug 26, 2005 7:23 pm

Now, I do believe that Besters is still in toy/comic revulsion-state, and that Iki has given up most things transformers?

Nothing to do or say about Iki, I'm sure he feels better tho.

Richer atleast.

But BESTERS.. I do believe that you have 2 MP PRIMES. Is it so, that you have already sold them away? If not, would you consider donating one of them to a young man in need...well.. me?

I'll pay shipping if I can have it. Hey, you wanna be rid of all this stuff, right?

BTW: May I please, if by chance you got them, have your Cybertron/GF Optimus and Vector Prime too?

Thanks.

Brendocon · Post by **Brendocon** » Sat Aug 27, 2005 2:51 pm

You've bumped a nine month old topic to ask for toys?

Wow.

The Last Autobot · Post by **The Last Autobot** » Sat Aug 27, 2005 6:15 pm

Brendocon wrote:You've bumped a nine month old topic to ask for toys?

Wow.

Well he was in a dire need?

And dont be so hard on him!! It was really only 8 months

Jazz · Post by **Jazz** » Mon Aug 29, 2005 6:43 am

to tell you the truth iam probly not gona help this but i know what you mean iam always on a buddy of mine collecting and displying but you know something he likes and i should be cool with it. i used too collect but i stoped i guess you can say i sort of grew up but i did not sale mine i stuck them in a attic of my house and there they sit un touched for about a year and to tell you the truth i have a lot more money now. but best of luck to you .

Predabot · Post by **Predabot** » Mon Aug 29, 2005 3:57 pm

I don't acctually collect either.

I just feel that MP Prime is every transfans wet dream, and it would be uber to have on of those.

Especially if I can get one for free from Besters.

Shanti418 · Post by **Shanti418** » Tue Aug 30, 2005 4:42 am

I thought it was weird that you bumped this thread, but thinking that BF would give you an MP for free has TOTALLY trumped that.

Post by **Best First** » Tue Aug 30, 2005 9:10 am

hmm.

**** off?

Post by **Kaylee** » Tue Aug 30, 2005 9:11 am

Best First wrote:hmm.

**** off?

Predabot · Post by **Predabot** » Tue Aug 30, 2005 10:42 am

Aww, come on!

Gimme one! You've got several, and you don't collect anymore either, so why not help fullfill a young mans dream?

Impactor returns 2.0 · Post by **Impactor returns 2.0** » Tue Aug 30, 2005 10:55 am

oh well whilst your hadning away your money - i mean transformers, the ones you money for.

Can i have one for free to?

Post by **Best First** » Tue Aug 30, 2005 12:11 pm

1) I don'thave several MP Primes
2) I am selling teh stuff that i don't want, not giving it away to irritants

Predabot · Post by **Predabot** » Wed Aug 31, 2005 8:36 pm

Best First wrote:1) I don'thave several MP Primes
2) I am selling teh stuff that i don't want, not giving it away to irritants

DAMN!

It was such a beautiful dream...

Post by **Kaylee** » Wed Aug 31, 2005 8:39 pm

Best First wrote: 2) I am selling teh stuff that i don't want, not giving it away to irritants

{dies laughing}

christ, lucky i swallowed my drink before i read that- it'd have gone all over my computer!!!

sprunkner · Post by **sprunkner** » Wed Aug 31, 2005 9:05 pm

I just gotta say... ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha.